Tic tock.. Tic Tock..

Tic tock.. Tic Tock..

Hard to work today

Lazy Friday is what I call today. Just like the bisons in the picture that Emilie sent from France more than a month ago. That just reminds me that I have not reply her email since coming back from D.C. Downstairs, about 80 kids are screaming and kicking. I don't understand why they have to have these kids coming to the university to play during summer time. Have they forgotten that people work here? To think that these parents pay hundreds of dollars a week to send these kids here. I am just surprise why they don't just send them to summer camps. At least, these kids will learn valuable things in the nature, instead of running around on campus ground. It's just crazy. They have been using the conference room next door as lunch room, and the administrators allow it. I don't think the janitors are happy because they have just cleaned the carpet and walls during the spring. How much revenue are they gaining from all these summer uni kids program. I simply do not think that it's worth sacrificing the peace and quiet working environment for the staffs here for anything at all. I just don't get it. How much of concentration and work can we get from all these noises!?! It is Friday afternoon, and I can't say enough how I would enjoy walking out of here today and dying for a good weekend.

Circle of life

If you seek, how is that different from pursuing sound and form? If you don't seek, how are you different from earth, wood or stone? You must seek without seeking. —Fo-Yan How true are the words above. We are always seeking for peace, for answers to things that caused us distress, seeking way out from the closed darkness and to seek to be loved. When do we stop seeking? In dreams, we seeked for something nice but when do we find it? In death, perhaps one will stop seeking but in turn, another seeker is born. It is a never ending circle. Even today, I find myself walking the same path that I paused at not long ago. It is crazy and disturbing. Unfinished work came back to haunt me. I am left with no choice. Not now, until I walk this thorny path up the hills to a green pasture.

Chinese New Year

A few years ago, Chinese New Year was still a big deal. Canadian experience thought me to dim it a little over the years. This is the 5th year without a real CNY celebration. Well, I am afraid that some traditions may have slowly crept to the unconscious part of my memory. DO I miss it? OH yea! Lots, but it takes lot more work to celebrate it these days. Is stress, work, and more work a good reason to be forfeiting the thousand-year-old tradition? Guilt seeps in. Mum called two days back,"How are you celebrating it this year?" "Erm... ma, I have presentation and papers due that day. Cannot really do it" "Oh, so? Got any new clothes?" "Ma...... I am really busy". Silent. More guilt. It made me feel worst when I am packing my bags and head off to NY in 5 days. "Why not come home?", mum asked. "I wish, ma but you know I can't. Not now. I want to spend more time at home, and 5 days is not worth it for a 22 hr flight". "Oh, well okay then. Take care and remember to do something on Chinese New Year. Don't say bad things or throw tantrum okay? It is not auspicious". "Yes ma, love u... talk to you after my paper before I go to NY". Click. I wonder, how my mum look like when she was talking to me on the other end. Will I feel better knowing that she is fine with the whole thing? Or otherwise. It might turn out to be a nightmare for me tonight. Ah! How I wish I could warp home in a sec. I could only keep it up and smile now. At least, that would keep her worries away (hopefully).

Two zero zero five

To zero zero five: I wish that you will give us all more hope for a less violent year. It is disheartening to look back at your past, dear zero five because so many have suffered. Do you think mankind deserves all that? We have done many things that we have not been very proud of, so I guess .... hmm.. I've answered my own question.