Home, cakes, crumbles and cries

I was in the mall on Boxing day when it my cell rang. A voice in the other end went "Dear, where are your family holidaying this Christmas?" "The Borneo, what happen?" "Something bad has happened in Indonesia and many people died in Thailand, India and Malaysia" "Oh.." That was my best expression. Mom and family was suppose to fly back to Kuala Lumpur that morning. What could have happened? My stomached coiled and I began to feel squirmy feeling from within. I have to know if everyone is safe. Whatever that had happen is serious enough to trigger calls and.... so many nations are involved? When I finally got home and glued myself in front of the computer monitor, tears just rolled down. Could this be a sign of appocalypse? I finally got a message from my sister a few hours later informing me that everyone was fine at home. The heavy barrel inside was lifted. Messages slowly start to pour in from friends all over who expressed concerns; those who informed about their safety also expressed gratitude. I washed off the crumbles on the baking plate. The sight of the crumbles floating on the water sents shivers once again. "Oh my God" I cried silently. It was holiday, and supposedly a Holy Day for many when the tragedy took place. Prayers were repeated inside my head. For those who'd loss their love ones, I hope they be recovered. For those who'd survived, I pray that strength will continue to surge from within, and the will to live and fight on allows them to go through this challenging moment. The death toll of one shocking tragedy of 2004 as of Dec 31, was around 150,000. Did I spend my last day of the year in tears? Laughter? Neither. I call it a beginning of hope, and grateful that my love ones are still around to continue as my inspiration in life. I wish this new year and years that follow it will be pathed in a gentler manner. My boyfriend called this a tragic century. I beg to differ. The century has just begun, not ending. Miracles still continue to happen in the midst of all the cries. Optimism.... my dear And to all, may love encircles the self, the others and the together. Happy New Year.

My tired look. I need to get a better life. 

It's painful

Ahh!! Painful back again. I desperately need a massage. It seems like an almost never ending complain during this time of the year. I don't hate Christmas, but the year is coming to an end, and I am mssing it already. Too many good things happen this year. Am I scared of tomorrow? A little. I don't know what lies ahead for me, but I hope it ain't gonna be bad. What can I say? Tick Tock... tick tock.. I cannot stop time from going forward. Now, back to my book...

Oh my my... Not again :-(

It's The time of the year again. Ah! I don't want to be a pessimist or a party pooper but Christmas is depressing me when I cannot be with the ones I love. I miss the gathering and Oh! the yapping and yapping and more yapping of my forever young aunts. Gosh, 7 of them. And not to forget, the forever supportive husbands who never seem to learn to keep their comments to themselves. (No, I don't want to know how many pounds I've put on this year.. end of story). Some people, you have to hate them in order to love them, if you know what I am saying. Well, I just have to make the best out of minimal this year. Mommy and daddy are far away as usual.. Who's fault? None, but my very own "ambitious", and what do I get? NO TURKEY for Christmas! Sigh... It's okay, I'll just roast myself a mid size chicken. *chuckle* At least, my dear partner in crime and loving boyfriend is nearby to keep me company, and lend his support. Another thing about the time of the year is the resolution making. I've always detested this, but someone reminded me that I've yet to acheive any of my resolution made last year and this year, that is to lose another 15 pounds. It's a disappointment. I think by now, I can qualify as a good candidate for Bridget Jone's most look-a-like title (Sigh). Procrastination, my biggest enemy of all time. It seems to be sticking on to me ever since birth. "Girl, go wash the dishes" "Later, mom I am busy watching tv" "Girl, bring your sis upstairs to bed" "Ok mom, just a minute" "Honey, I think the water is boiling" "Okok.. coming (but still glued on the chair)" Darn it! I have to definitely change that before I start hating myself for becoming a procrastinator! Am I the only one? Oh,... man maybe not but probably the worst! Hmm, I have to do this otherwise...... Ok, I don't know what will happen but it will surely not be something positive. Hmm, that's my thinking recipe for tonight. Perhaps, I can come up with the right answer tomorrow.